the exile

Written Sept. 21, 2001

Ice and snow, Like daggers thrown from the hand of God
Fall from the sky to pierce my soul
I am alone, a nomad
I have been banished from my homeland
By my own cursed voice inside my skull,
I have journeyed far away from my home, wondering, wandering light-years away
I have no future but my ongoing sojourn: finding my true love
It has only been two years but it feels like eons
I have run from home only because of my laziness
I could not wait for my knight in scintillating armor, no
I would, fool that I am, find him myself,
Risking my life for the sake of being happy and- being loved
Without rhyme or reason, I have left the comfort of my own home
I have been utterly distracted
I am a disgrace

Wind blows biting and bitter
Cutting my cheeks and burning my lips
I shiver then cackle, what a fool I have been all these years
Black clouds roll across the sky
Like the boiling green muck bubbling in a witch?s cauldron
Far away from home I ride
My neighbor?s horse, the only thing I have from back home
We gallop across the forbidden trails and hidden chambers inside my heart

As I race from my past, I am reminded of my simple, average life before I left
I remember my best friend, I could never forget her
I am haunted by memories of myself when I was in school-
A loner with few friends; I cared only about my art
Ah! If only they could see me now, a nineteen year old vagabond
With bedraggled locks of snarled brown hair and dirt on my face
Clad in filthy rags fit only for dusting off a window sill

A hapless loser, riding a stolen horse
Searching for her lover
Would never find such a man if he were to be found
For the girl was filth
Unless he saw past her wretched appearance
And looked into her soul-
That is the one she looks and risks her life for
Many think her an idiot, a sentimental fool
But she knows
As she gallops farther and further away from her home
That she is nearing the end of her journey
And closer to her true love